<p>5:31 <i>For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh</i>- &quot;For this cause&quot; is hard to interpret. Because of what? Does Paul mean that the whole marriage and bonding process is to teach us of our personally becoming one with the Lord Jesus? The special psychological bonding which is given by God whereby two persons become one, over time, therefore points to the work of the Spirit in the life of the individual who is attached to Christ. And as there must be a leaving of the family of origin, so there is to be a leaving of previous spiritual associations. That point had to be emphasized to the new converts to whom Paul wrote, be they from paganism or Judaism.</p><p>The radical value attached to every individual in Christ is brought out especially by the New Testament teaching about family life. There were many pagan 'household codes', which basically exhorted the slaves, children and women to be subordinate to the male leaders of the family. Paul frames his family teaching in exactly the terms of these 'household codes' in order to bring out the significant differences between God's way and the way of society in this vital area. The fact Paul and Peter in their 'household codes' speak of the head of the house being submissive and having responsibilities to love, as an act of the will, was quite radical. But those male leaders had to learn that in Christ, everyone matters, and people can't be treated by their brethren as they are by society generally, as nothing and nobody, mere cogs in a machine. The <i>familia</i>, or extended family in contemporary thought, was of itself devaluing to persons. A woman married into her husband's extended family, and effectively lost so much of her uniqueness as an individual- indeed women were so often treated as faceless. But Paul teaches, on the sure foundation of Genesis, that a man should <i>leave</i> his parents and <i>cleave</i> to his wife (Eph. 5:31). This was far more radical than may now appear. The man was being taught that merely perpetuating the extended family, using the woman you received in your arranged marriage in order to continue and expand the family, was not in fact God's way. He was to <i>leave</i> that extended family mindset and personally <i>cleave</i> to his wife in love- love which was an act of the will. He was to start a new family unity; to love his <i>wife</i> rather than his extended family &quot;as himself&quot;. Likewise fathers are told to bring their children up in the instruction of the Lord Jesus (Eph. 6:4)- when the task of training up children was left to the women, older children and slaves (especially the <i>paidagogos</i>) in the extended family. The value of persons implicit here was thus a call to be essentially creative, independent, perceiving the personal rather collectively-imposed value in both oneself and others in ones' family.</p><p>&ldquo;God hath <i>tempered</i> the (ecclesial) body together... that there should be no schism in the body&quot; (1 Cor. 12:24,25 AV) uses a related word as in Eph. 5:31 concerning how a man &quot;shall be <i>joined</i> unto his wife... I speak concerning Christ and the church&quot;. Because both man and woman ultimately represent Christ, there should be no schism between either believers, nor husbands and wives.&nbsp;Husbands and wives become &quot;one flesh&quot;. But &quot;flesh&quot; is almost equivalent to &quot;body&quot; (see Eph. 2:15,16; Col. 1:22)- their union of &quot;one flesh&quot; is parallel to the union of the &ldquo;one body&quot; within the ecclesia. &nbsp;We should all be &quot;perfectly <i>joined</i> together (marriage language) in the same mind&quot; (1 Cor. 1:10). Recall how &ldquo;Israel <i>joined</i> himself unto Baalpeor&quot; (Num. 25:3) in a sexual context. Hos. 9:10 comments on this as meaning that Israel &quot;Separated themselves unto&quot; Baalpeor. We cannot be 'joined to' something unless we are 'separated from' something else. If we are truly joined to Christ and each other, we <i>must</i> be separated from idolatry. It is impossible to experience this 'joining' with believers who are not 'separated'- one cannot be 'joined' in intercourse to more than one person. We <i>cannot</i> serve two masters without <i>hating</i> God.</p>